To be vulnerable means you’re susceptible to emotional or physical injury. You’re open to attack. Your guard is down and your boundaries weakened. Let’s use my relocation as an example.
I am usually, pretty much, in control of my own life. I know how to take responsibility, get things done and do them right. Ninety-nine percent of the time, okay maybe ninety-seven, I feel good about myself. When I don’t have the answers I know where to turn. But now, I was in a new environment, hence strange. I had no experience to fall back on. I had no blueprint. With all my intelligence I was at a loss. I was handicapped. And because of this loss, I became vulnerable.
I didn’t know how to prime my water pump. I didn’t know how to contact municipalities or services, if necessary. I couldn’t just walk into a grocery store and find what I wanted. I didn’t even know if they had what I wanted. And mind you none of this seemed so bad when my partner was with me. We would have fun with the challenge. We would laugh with the store clerks as they would laugh at us, dumb gringos, trying to communicate.
Did we have Spanish books and translators? Of course we did; but, the translations just aren’t always the same and the verb, adverb thing gets all weird. And things have gender. It didn’t matter. It was all an adventure. But now, it wasn’t an adventure any more. I was dealing with real issues: pumps, the well, the cistern, the pool, and the dogs—all of it. It was all unfamiliar and I was doing it alone! My perspective of my situation changed. It went from being a fun, fabulous and fascinating adventure to being a horrific, harrowing hassle. I was allowing myself to energetically drain.
Am I Okay?
My loss of good energy caused my self confidence, self-esteem, and sense of knowing to be hit and they were hit hard.
Subconsciously, the question that was being asked over and over was am I okay or will I be okay. My partner was gone. I relied on him for transportation, direction and protection in a strange place. We had each other in the unfamiliar. Now, that was gone; it was more loss. Deep down inside, my spirit knew I’d be just fine. But, in my soul realm: mind, will and emotional realm, I questioned. I wasn’t sure.
What did that cause? You guessed: anxiety, stress, negativity, and subtle depression. Creating what? Like one of my favorite oldies groups, The Temptations, would say a ball of confusion. What did that ball of confusion create and attract? You know the answer—anxiety, stress, negativity, and more depression. And what did that magnet create? You see how the cycle is created? I wasn’t consciously asking for any of this.
So, remember the pumps, the well, the cistern, the pool, the dogs and the shyster realtors? (Let me say here that there were and still are very good realtors in this beach area. It just takes flushing them out.) They all became my enemies. The pumps broke down, the cistern overflowed, the pool turned green, the lab chased and killed the neighbor’s cat. And, for the realtors? We’ll just let that subject alone. Confusion begat more confusion. Drama begat more drama.
When the light goes out
When you lose positive; good; and balanced energy due to difficult change or life transition, you grope in the dark, eyes wide open, trying to find your way—trying to figure things out. You bump into obstacles. You stumble. You fall. You can become drained spiritually, emotionally, mentally and even physically. The bumping, stumbling, the falling can cause bruising. The bruising can turn into wounds or hurts, creating and attracting more negative energy.
Might this explain why terrible things seem to always happen to the same and often good people? May this be the reason why some fall and can never get up? May this be the answer to why others drop into the seemingly bottomless, hopeless pit: the abyss? No matter what they do, no matter how hard they try, no matter how hard they pray (and yes I did say pray; I know many believers in this situation) or do the work, they keep coming up short? Simply, in life transition the energy—the brilliance and the light can be drained sometimes going out leaving us in hopelessness, stuck in painful cycles, limiting and blocking our possibilities.
Let’s take a look at four of life’s more difficult transitions: a move, a divorce, a job change, and the death of a friend or loved one. Have you been through any one of these? How did you feel before, during and after the transition? Did you become mentally fatigued? Did your body react? Were there physical manifestations? I would always become ill a few weeks after starting a new job.
Life transition can leave us what? You’ve got it! Vulnerable: susceptible to attack either mentally, emotionally, physically and even spiritually. Long exposure to these transitions can cause grave damage to the adrenal system which can leave you open to “dis”ease: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia, heart problems; and yes, even cancer. A cycle of these transitions can lead to distorted thinking: irrational decisions and behavior, borderline personality, and phobias. That is, unless you have a positive solution, a method, a means of dealing with the transition.
Pulling Yourself Up and Out
What can you do to pull you out of the muck and mire, up and out of the attack? First let me start by reminding you of some basics. You are an incredibly amazing being. You are made in the image and likeness of God. You are perfection. You are magnificence. You are awesome. You are beautifully and fearfully or graciously made from reverence in reverence. You are energy! You are atoms (Adam) filled with light! You are truth. You are god in the earth.
We all have ways of dealing with life transition. However, when you’re feeling or have become vulnerable, you may need to amp up the healing practices or learn new methods in order to come through the transition, the trial, the test without too much damage. We’ll look at these in the next episode.
—To be continued
- Vulnerability In Change (urnotavictim.wordpress.com)
- 8 Energy Zappers – and How to Avoid Them… (mindfulmod.com)
- What Is Chronic Fatigue – Being aware of Its Nature and Treatments (boldstate.com)